INFIDELITY STATISTICS

provided by womansavers.com

It's tough to get a handle on how many of us are having affairs, given the inherent secrecy.

• 22 percent of married men have strayed at least once during their married lives.
• 14 percent of married women have had affairs at least once during their married lives.
• Younger people are more likely candidates; in fact, younger women are as likely as younger men to be unfaithful.
• 70 percent of married women and 54 percent of married men did not know of their spouses' extramarital activity.
• 5 percent of married men and 3 percent of married women reported having sex with someone other than their spouse in the 1997.
• 22 percent of men and 14 percent of women admitted to having sexual relations outside their marriage sometime in their past.
• 90 percent of Americans believe adultery is morally wrong.
• 50 percent of Americans say President Clinton's adultery makes his moral standard "about the same as the average married man,'' according to a Time-CNN poll.
• 61 percent of Americans thought adultery should not be a crime in the United states; 35 percent thought it should; 4 percent had no opinion.
• 17 percent of divorces in the United States are caused by infidelity.

Why Men Cheat 

By their very nature, men constantly feel an impulse to cheat. Society has conditioned men to ignore this impulse, but not all men do. When a man cheats on a woman, naturally, the woman will blame herself, even if just a little. In many cases when a man cheats, it was not the woman's fault whatsoever, but rather just an inevitability of sorts. Women have a tendency to overanalyze why men cheat. For women, cheating can be a complicated and emotional occurrence. Therefore, they assume it must also be complicated for men. That's not true. As with most questions, often the simplest answer is the correct answer. In some ways, men are like domesticated dogs. You can train Scruffles not to bark. You can take him to obedience classes where he further is conditioned not to bark. But if someone knocks on the door, he's probably going to bark. Let's take a look at some reasons why men cheat:

  

Five Surefire Signs Your Partner is cheating   Find out for sure if your partner is being unfaithful

Because They Could Women generally need prerequisites before engaging in a sexual affair. They need the man to make them feel secure. They need to feel longed for. They need to feel sexy and youthful. Men simply need a woman who wants to have sex. That's it. For some men, the mere knowledge of a woman who wants to have sex with them is enough to make them cheat. We'll call this 'caveman syndrome'. Let's not forget what the most primitive male homo-sapiens were like. They were hardwired to spread their seed as much as possible to ensure the continuation of their species. Since that time, humans have simply not evolved enough for men to completely ignore this impulse Because They Couldn't One of the most basic rules of humanity that you should commit to memory right now is that people want what they can't have. 'Cheating', by its very definition, implies that something wasn't meant to be had. For that very reason, people will want it. Let's remember, 'cheating' only exists because we invented it. It is not a universal rule of nature, like gravity. Ask yourself: what type of man can't possibly cheat no matter how much he wants to? A religious man? An expecting father? A newlywed? Nope. A man who is allowed to be with other women. He can't cheat, because there are no expectations of loyalty placed upon him!

By expecting a man not to cheat, the chance of him cheating increases. Some men might cheat because they feel it is their only outlet to feel like a 'bad boy' again. Domesticate a dog too much, and he'll either get depressed or rebellious

Boredom/Curiosity

This is both a physiological and psychological reason for cheating. Humans are curious creatures. After being with the same woman for long enough, men can simply get curious. They start to forget what it's like to be with a different woman. By simply being curious about what it would be like to sleep with another woman, some men may pursue a sexual affair. For any woman hoping to prevent this from happening with their mate: work with your partner to keep your sex life interesting and exciting. A man who is not bored with his current sex life is unlikely to seek out a new sexual partner.

 

Peer Pressure

One of the strongest forces in getting people to do anything is peer pressure. It's no surprise that one reason why a man might cheat is for that reason. Since monogamous relationships are the norm in our society, it's unlikely that a man will be flat-out advised to have an affair. However, more subtle pressures from friends and coworkers could lead to a man deciding to cheat. For example, a man with single friends may be inadvertently persuaded to cheat simply from hearing of their friends' sexual endeavors.

 

Snowball Effect

Some men cheat simply because they, in a roundabout way, have forgotten they're not supposed to. A lifestyle that starts with occasional trips to a strip club and guys-night-out at the bar might eventually lead to more open flirting with female coworkers and friends which could ultimately result in an affair. To compare men to dogs again: a dog might know he's not supposed to bark, but if he gets away with enough smaller noises and grumbles, he eventually might start to think he's allowed to bark again. Give a man an inch, and he'll eventually want two inches.

In closing, the lesson to learn here is that men don't usually cheat solely because of their mate. Men are macrocheaters. They don't use cheating as a tool for revenge or malice. There is often very little emotion involved when a man cheats. Just like the dog barking after someone knocked on the door, some men cheat because they weren't thinking. It probably happened too fast and seemed too natural for them to avoid it.

Five Reasons Why Your Wife Will Cheat On You

Women, just as men, have affairs.  Although statistically men have affairs more often than women do, wives still cheat.  In fact, the number of wives cheating on husbands has risen dramatically over the past few years.  Currently, new studies now show that between 35% and 40% of all wives cheat on husbands while the statistics for men are between 40% and 50%.  If you suspect your wife is having an affair, it could be for any number of reasons, five we listed below for your information.

• Lack of Attention – Women typically love attention.  Therefore, when they feel they are being ignored, they might look somewhere else.  For instance, if a husband comes home each night expecting dinner to be on the table, the house cleaned, and the kids finished with homework, he walks in but passes the wife without a hug, kiss, or acknowledgement for a job well done, she is going to feel isolated and ignored.  Now, when that same woman visits the grocery store and a man shopping in the same section smiles at her or perhaps picks up something she dropped, she immediately feels important.
• Quality Time – Even if a husband were spending time at home or with the wife, if he is constantly working, reading, doing chores outside, and so on, it means his wife is not getting any quality time.  Most women want and need special time such as a date night.  With this, she is pampered and given the husband’s full attention.
  

Unsure if your lover is being unfaithful?    It's time you know the truth

Lack of Confidence – Over time, couples can become so comfortable with one another that they forget the importance of dating and affection.  Eventually, a wife may begin to feel a lack of self-confidence.  When a woman gets into this kind of rut, she no longer feels beautiful and sexy, as she once did.  If another man is paying attention to her, adoring her, offering her compliments, or inviting her to lunch or dinner, she suddenly gains confidence, feeling again like a woman. Lack of Intimacy – An old belief is that men are more sexual than women are.  The truth is that many women are just as sexual than the husband is, if not more so.  Therefore, if the marriage has become stale and stagnant, otherwise boring in the bedroom, some women will look for physical satisfaction outside the home in the form of an affair. Finances – Depending on the situation, some couples are overwhelmed with bills.  In addition to the mortgage, there is the cost of the children, school, groceries, sports, you name it, and the money is gone.  This means the wife seldom has extra to buy a new dress, go out with friends, or simply splurge on herself.  Although this challenge can be hard to fix, but not impossible, if another man were offering her bling, taking her places, and showering her with gifts, she may feel inclined to cheat.

How To Prevent Infidelity

While you can never be safe enough (infidelity can plague almost any relationship), you can definitely take a few steps to help prevent infidelity from seeping into your life. These tips can definitely decrease the chances that your partner cheats on you. They also make your relationship richer and healthier.

 

The first thing you always have to remember is to stay connected to one another. Be your partner's best friend. The reason behind affairs is often times the lack of companionship and intimacy one feels in his or her relationship. Therefore, it is no wonder that affairs start as friendships. People always need companionship and if they cannot find it through their partner, chances are that they will look for it elsewhere. Do not let huge life issues and changes, like the birth of a baby or career transition, come in the way of your connection.

Don't Lose Your One True Love, Fix Your Marriage

You always need to keep the communication lines open. Communication is very critical for the relationship to survive. You need to be an expressive talker and a good listener, as well. Do not jump to conclusions and do not be critical or volatile. Stay calm and loving. Share your feelings with each other. Many of the problems couples face have to do with communication. If you need something, ask for it in a kind way. If you are not happy about something, express it in a kind way. Do not be judgmental. If you make your partner feel uncomfortable every time he or she voices something, you can bet that the communication between you is suffering. Your partner will look elsewhere for acceptance and kindness.   Another critical way to prevent infidelity is to be sexually active with your partner. Many people in long-term relationships suffer in this arena. By suffering, we mean that they do not engage in sex. Sex is often used as a tool of punishment. Women commonly refuse to be physical with their husbands when they are upset at the slightest thing. This can only cause harm. People in relationships need to be sexually active with each other, if they want to keep the relationship alive and successful. Further, they need to communicate what they want in bed.

They need to work to keep each other satisfied. Repeatedly denying sex to your partner will make them contemplate infidelity. Everyone likes to feel desirable and attractive.

 

It is true; we all need ego boosts now and then. That is why providing support is so very important. If your partner wants to go back to school, be supportive. If he or she wants to make a huge career change or start a new hobby, be supportive. As long as the cause is beneficial or neutral, be supportive. If it is a wrong or questionable cause, communicate your opinions and concerns calmly and effectively. Do not be controlling and critical if you want to prevent the chances of infidelity. Always remember that it is not difficult for your partner to find a supporting and understanding secret friend out there.

 

 

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